The Good, The Bad, The Ugly: Part II
When you’ve forged a beautiful friendship with someone who works for you, at what point do you realize the separation of business and personal? It’s a fine line, and if you’re not careful, you’ll never give it due attention.
You’re reading Part Two of a series. For clarity and flow, start at the beginning. Names in this article have been changed.
I can count on one hand the number of friends I would trust with my innermost secrets and desires. Sue was one of them. The problem is, she worked for me, and this made addressing business snafus difficult. A few years into our working relationship, I ran across several issues that, as an employer, did not sit well. In an effort to maintain a healthy relationship I remained optimistic, overly trusting and would find ways to subtly and ever-so-politely address concerns.
Being rather busy, many of our work-related discussions took place over the phone, where I would give instructions on what I needed done. This caused problems , because many times I’d log into our systems and see that either the work hadn’t been done to specifications, or had not been done at all. When I’d approach the subject I would be met with conflicting statements about how I hadn’t explained things properly, or didn’t actually bring up the topic at all. Since my work days were so intensely busy, sometimes I couldn’t even be certain of what I’d said, and other times when I was certain, I assumed she truly didn’t understand what had been requested.
In my field, I have to find ways to explain technical issues in laymen’s terms. In turn, I request clients explain what they want in as much detail as possible, even if it means talking to me like I’m an idiot. It’s so much better to get things clear the first time around.
The trainer in me was rather confident I’d explain procedures appropriately; the sleep-deprived, overworked, coffee fiend in me couldn’t always be certain. This, coupled with the fact that there were many things I did not know - for instance, I didn’t know how to file sales tax reports, maintain adequate Quickbooks files, or reconcile the merchant account statements - led me to the conclusion that Sue needed additional training. It was not my job to be proficient in the responsibilities she had; this was the reason I hired her in the first place.
Believing Sue would learn much better in a one-on-one environment, I hired a local firm to train her how to do particular tasks, using specific software. I provided the trainer with a complete outline, copies of any programs necessary and required Sue to use her own laptop during these sessions. The hourly rate, I thought, was way higher than the norm, but I saw this as an investment in my company.
During this time I realized the importance of providing tasks and instructions in writing. I began to follow up phone calls, or bypass them altogether, sending e-mails instead. Unfortunately, I archived both inter-office and other business correspondence together, so I’d wind up shrugging off the “you never told me’s” or “you weren’t clear’s” because sifting through tens of thousands of messages would just take too much time.
Several weeks after the training began I took a trip to New York and found that the lion’s share of the work was being done long-hand and a great deal of computer-based assignments were not completed. When I addressed the issue, I was told again that Sue did not know how to do what I wanted. I found that the only training session that was successful entailed Sue learning how to back up her computer files on CD. If anything, her skills with Microsoft Excel and our accounting software had worsened.
Then I thought back to some of the cell phone conversations we’d had while she was on her way to training - and how I’d hear her ordering breakfast and coffee for two at the Dunkin’ Donuts drive-thru. It made me wonder if perhaps they were actually spending training time chit-chatting over coffee and donuts. When I discovered that the trainer also worked at a local Best Buy and was advising on specific equipment to purchase under her employee number, I knew that their relationship was beyond professional. I pulled the plug on any subsequent work with that company and opted for Sue to utilize call-in support services available for software programs and paperwork filing.
I did tell Sue that I felt the trainer had been taking advantage of my willingness to pay for support, and she immediately became defensive. At the time, I couldn’t understand why. And that led me back to the usual-the words “best friend” would swirl about my head despite my need to don a realistic “boss” cap.
Often, the friend aspect would outweigh everything else, and I eventually realized that Sue knew this about me and used it to her advantage. I hadn’t yet reached the point of resentment - it would actually be a long time before that sentiment overcame me. But deep in my gut, I knew something was wrong, even while my mind kept telling me I needed her by my side, lest the company fall apart.
Next Up: Issues begin to be addressed, but at what cost?
